Mae has chosen to play baseball. 

A new experience.

Mae does not like to be observed while doing something.

Mae does not perform on command.

This could pose a challenge.

The idea of placing her foot on a base, that already has the foot of a boy on it, another obstacle.

In spite of the initial challenges, each game she stretches herself and with one game at a time there is progress.

Batting has proven to be interesting.

She strikes out and it is not the least bit concerning to her.

What does concern her is that when she does hit the ball and runs to first base. What then?

“What do I do next?”

“And when I get to third base, what then? What do I do?”

“I’m confused.”

Her coach reassures her not to worry.

“You just hit that ball Mae and you run to first base. After that we’ll tell you what to do.”

For Mae, this is not an answer.

She has flat out said she is confused as to what to do when she gets to third base.

She strikes out again.

I think about this while driving home after praying for Mae to hit that damn ball and run. I visualize, I cheer. But no. No hit. No sound of a ball connecting with a bat. Just Mae confirming that she wants to know what to do after she hits the ball and gets to first base.

The what then, is blocking her from literally going forward.

I think about me.

I think about my own plans and how I know what I can do, I know what I need to do, but then I let it get ahead of me and I stop, with that monumental question; then what?

What do I do next? What if I don’t know how to do it? What if I don’t have what it takes?

What if I don’t have the resources?

Then I go back to Mae. 

She’s afraid she won’t know what to do next. She doesn’t really get the game yet. Her coaches telling her not to worry, they’ll be there, they’ll tell her the next step, they’ll guide her, isn’t appearing to be the solution.

Her fear gets the better of her. She gets ahead of herself with worry as to what to do after first base. But she hasn’t even made it to first base.

I think about me.

I don’t even begin, because I’m already worried about what to do next. I forget to trust that Life will be there for me if I allow it. I push away the guidance that is waiting for me in the wings that will take me through because I have given my energy over to the fear, the doubt. 

Life says, “Just take this step, one step and then the next will appear. You don’t need to know all of the steps. You don’t need to have all the details of the “How.” Just one step at a time.”

Life says, “Don’t get ahead of yourself. Stay right here, where you are now and just do what is presented at this time. See where it takes you, what presents itself after you do this step. The step you need to take now.”

Life says, “Enjoy where you are right now and then rather than fear what comes next, you’ll be excited towards what will be presented to you.”

I want Mae to tell her fear to, “Shove It!” to “Get out of my way!” To hit that ball and run. To trust her coach will be there to tell her what to do next.

I’m going to take my next step and trust that Life will be there to guide me  forward.

No more hiding behind confusion, no more doubt whether we can do it, or know what to do. The Coaches of Life are there for us.

Let’s hit that damn ball and run!

Photos by; Sharon Cooke